RELATIONSHIP DEAL BREAKERS...................II

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NEEDINESS: Neediness is a desire for constant affirmation that your man/lady is still in love with you and would never leave you. In as much as we need that confirmation that our partner is still in love with us, a needy partner has a constant fear of being left. So he or she becomes clingy and this is emotionally draining for the other person. 

A needy partner shows great deal of lack of self confidence thereby taking away every sweetness in the relationship. 

Are you the needy one in a relationship? Think about this: Before you met your partner, you used to be alone or rather you used to be without him or her. Then why act like you can't suddenly survive without  him or her. 

Times will come when your partner needs space away from any distraction which includes you. Respect the person's space and give them that privilege of an alone time.

Nobody wants a needy partner, so instead of being tolerated in a relationship, put your acts together. Be independent and work on your self confidence. You don't need anybody to be great, happy, successful or comfortable in life. When you have worked on having a great personality, then your partner can enjoy you in the relationship and you in turn enjoy him/her.

Confidence is sexy and one of the greatest assets especially for ladies. Quit being the needy one in a relationship.

INSECURITY: The biggest attraction killer is insecurity. Now let me ask you, What are you actually insecure about? (Some really can be insecure but are not aware of it. Identification is the first step to getting rid of insecurities). 

Your body, your career, your future, your job, your looks...........The list can be endless. Some ladies work so hard at getting an "hour glass'' figure just to be the perfect girl for her man (I ain't saying that is totally bad), but that shouldn't be the basis of the relationship. 

A relationship built on the way the lady looks or the way the guy looks is bound to fail cause looks disappoint. You can't always have control over the way you look. Be confident of every thing about you, that way who ever you are in a relationship with will appreciate you the way you are. 

People get disrespected in a relationship when they have not shown their partner that they respect them self 100%.  Men like women who call their shots and don't need input from anyone to be happy. When you have shown him you are content with yourself, then he fights to be relevant in your life (That's when Domino pizza and Beer is upgraded to red roses and Cristal champagne). 

Be secure about your body, beauty, career, future, opinion etc and that way you will remain sexy and wanted. 

UNNECESSARY TESTS: ''I want to test if she loves me or my money''
That's always the line from the men and they usually embark on this test when they have already gotten the girl and  already is a relationship with the girl.

''I want to know if this boy is stingy/caring enough or  it's just my body he wants''

Haba

The test game is on both sides. The girl wants to test her man and the boy wants to test his lady. We often forget that if we are tested that we may fail the test. Testing that person you love is already enough proof that you don't love him or her enough. 

Away with the test, If you truly love him/her then you don't need to test. The whole testing thing is just like a game which both parties are bound to fail. Then a beautiful relationship cracks up just cause you want to test if your partner loves you. 

Be true to yourself and know what you want. If you meet that one person you love and your heart agrees to that love, then by all means throw those love tests to the window. Let your findings about the sincerity and faithfulness of your partner's love come from events and occurrences in the relationship that you don't have control over. Then when you judge, your judgement is unbiased

                     ....................to be continued.

Big hugs to you'll.................Kender Loves YOU.....yes YOU

Photo credit: Manasseh Art.

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Comments

Softie said…
Nice one luv.. Waiting for d III
2 February 2016 at 09:10
Anonymous said…
Am loving every post.
2 February 2016 at 09:33
yemie said…
Kender you are indeed talking to me. Talk more
2 February 2016 at 09:34
Anonymous said…
Am still asking Kender, Are u married?
2 February 2016 at 09:35
Ifechi said…
I super love this one
2 February 2016 at 09:35
Anonymous said…
I love you too kender. I know it's me you were talking to .
2 February 2016 at 09:36
Zazzy said…
I believe what u talked about. Its just the truth
2 February 2016 at 09:37
Desmond said…
Pls am waiting for III. Cos Its so true. U better write a book to complie all this your plenty relationship knowledge.
2 February 2016 at 09:39
Brotex said…
Kender where have u been all my life. I need this. How can I meet you personally. We need to talk.
3 February 2016 at 18:13
Tonye said…
Pls am seriously waiting for part III. I need more of this relationship posts. You really know how to explain it well. Pls go deeper
3 February 2016 at 18:14
Michael said…
Very correct. How do I meet you personally. I stay in Lagos, Nigeria
3 February 2016 at 18:15
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